Matte
by bananacabanaboy
Summary: This sprang up after a rp I once played in... Not sure If I'm going to continue it since the rp didn't go very far, let me know if you like it and would like me to finish it. Still working on the next chapter but due to computer issues, it's still not up.
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

Violet- Like my love, like my blood

--Xois

Missions had been few and far in-between. Heero had been shoved face to face and battled with boredom for the first time over the past couple of weeks. He could only deny Duo his attentions for so long after he had descovered a few mission reports composed entirely of bullshit for the sake of keeping his time to himself. Of course the braided one had suffered a scalding lecture from Heero about personal privacy and that his fingers were to be severed off one by one if he ever touched his beloved lap top again.

To Heero's knowledge Duo had maintained his fair distance, but had kept a close eye on him at all times just the same. To his intense shame Heero had admitted to himself while drunk durring one of Duo's mindless drinking games that watching the braided pilot so closely could have very well been for reasons entirely seperate from the saftey and confidenciality of his lap top and it's contents. From then on anytime his subconcious would so care to remember that hidden and denied fact, a slow burn would creep its way through his skin presenting itself boldly upon his cheeks.'Baka' Heero rolled the nickname over his toungue several times in a rythmic pattern.

His heart stopped suddenly as he was virtually slapped in the face with reality as he registered the shocked expression on Duo's face. Realizing that he'd been staring at the space between Duo's legs for a solid ten minutes Heero clapped over his nose in an effort to prevent an embarrassing nosebleed. 'Shit' Cursing quietly to himself Heero's chair creeked in protest as he stood to feel his way to the bathroom in a quest for tissues.

But unfortunately enough for Heero the narrow hotel hallway littered with Duo's personal belongings must have been feeling particularly unforgiving to Heero that day. The Japanese boy had barely made three feet of headway before his foot entangled itself in one of the Braided one's hole infested T-shirts. The simple event launched Heero into and unexpected, and uncalculated chain of cause and effects. Durring the course of which his ankle was twisted, one of his toes suffered a painfull crack of the joints, and his forehead was smashed into the ede of the bathroom doorframe.

Once determined that he was reletively okay, even if his pride had taken a bit of a hard beating, Heero bullied his limbs into motion completing his journey to the restroom, a small if loud vent of frustrated steam escaped by means of slamming the door into it's frame. When the door eased quickly back out of it's place between the walls Heero growled a course 'Baka' at the door and the floating shower of cheap flaking paint that drifted mockingly to the floor from the assault.

Ignoring it he clutched the cold procelan of the sink and dropped his head between his shoulders with a sigh and a groan beating himself inwardly, savoring the brutal mentality. When he brought his face back up to stare at himself in the mirror blood dripping from his upperlip, his eyes squinted as a familier face seemed to appear and meet him with a sickly sweet feminine smile. Lifting an arm he smeared at the blood with a boyish swipe of the forearm, and reached for the immage tentitively with the trembling fingers of the other. The pale blue eyes regaurded him with a soft familiartiy that was unnerving. His mouth worked in unpermitted syllables as they uttered out the name "Relena" in a low rumbling growl. The smooth blue of her eyes had become Heero's internal symbolistic immage of peace. The ultimate goal that had ironically been viciously beaten into him as a young boy. His hand palmed her transparent cheek with a sort of curiousity, and intensity a child holds his mother. It sickened him.

When a soft bang on the door frame errupted through heero's brain, his concentration muted and the immage was lost -to an everlasting depth not even a reflection has hope of veiwing. His head whipped around to face the braided one, whose features communicated a genuine sympathetic worry. Washing the startled espression from his features he presented Duo with a blank and emotionless one instead and replyed with a flat 'Nani?' Duo leaned gracefully around the corner, palming the door frame as he came around, his braid only half completed swished fluidly behind him. "Heero, hey you okay in here? Hey what happened there man?" After recieving no more responce then the typical unreadable glare Duo continued his predetermined motions unindendant upon leaving him any room to reply anyway. He entered the bathroom without so much as a hesitant shrug and guided Heero to the toilet regaurdless of whatever risk he might be running of the barrle of Heero's gun pressing itself into his stomache and firring. He left Heero there to glare at him while he buisied himself with tearing a few sheets from the roll of toilet paper, dampening the thick wad in the

sink. He returned kneeling in front of the smaller boy and dabbed bravely at his cheek cleansing it of the unsightly red liquid sticking stubbornly to his flesh.

Duo's eyes flickered up to Heero's, unknowingly eliciting a shudder from the wing pilot. Heero had to force himself to resist the compulsive urge to allow his heart to flood over him, and drown in the eyes of Shinigami. -His- Shinigami. 'Funny...' Heero tumbled into an unexpected meloncholy. "I never noticed they were violet." Duo's head jerked upwards, his hand pulling away from Heero with uneasy abruptness as he locked gazes with Heero. A starttled nervous expression flickering over his features.

It would have been a daring move if Heero had been more than half concious of his actions. but he leant forward all the same closing any personal space that might have previously existed between the two. His hand took flight as if of it's oun accord. His thumb carressed Duo's cheek as he reguarded him with a detatched rapture. To horror Duo's horror, he quickly discovered that he was unable to look away from Heero. Feeling compelled to meet his analitical stare out of a certain fearful respect that he hadn't been all too aware of before that moment. Duo sucked in his breath filled with aprehension as Heero's thumb proceeded down to his lips.

He watched the expressions roll freely if subtle over Heeros face, expressions that Duo would soon relate to a preditary cat selecting his meal before pouncing. "That mouth of yours," Heero's brow creased with hidden thought before continuing. "It never does shut up does it?" Thrown just a little off by the simplicity and abstractness of the comment Duo was condemned to the unforgiving fates to be caught off his guard when Heero pressed his lips to Duo's in a rough, forcefull, unpracticed kiss.

The events of that day replayed throughout Heeros mind demanding his speculation that sunny but chilled afternoon. He and Duo had never spoken of in since. 'It's ammousing to continuously remind yourself of such things' Heero thought abcent mindedly as he sat on a cold park bench half heartedly listening to Relena's borring drabble about her school friends and whatever it was that they did. To the extent of his knowledge was that the only things school girls did with their weekends and spare time was to dress eachother up in gaudy lipstick, giggle their way through a poplular magazine

and go to the bathroom like it was a social gathering place.

His fingers interlaced as he turned his head to wath golden strands of hair cling to pink lipgloss in the fridgid air. 'It's interesting that I should continue to recal such a thing and bring it back to my concious where it will have no emotions to play on. Interesting that as the 'perfect soldier', one who has lived a life of stone cold truths and equally cold lies, that something within me cares to lament on that. When the life line to mine and the world's peacefull existance rests upon the fragile hands of Relena. Peacecraft' Heero took a deep breath struggling to understand his oun thoughts. With a rough green woollen glove he pushed the hair from his eyes, and slunk over almost mellow-dramatically with his head hung low. A learned posture from Duo, and not one he proclaimed to be proud of.

To Heero's dismay Relena had recognized the pose immediately and begun a hounding interrogation of Heeros inner workings, hurt that he would make it so obvious that he seemingly had no interest in what she was telling him. Even if she couldn't remember quite exactly what that was anymore. Heero sat straight back up onto his seat back and stared back at Relena with eyes that seemed to soak up the cold and send it straight back out sendingThe Peacecraft into a nearly silent fit of defences. She stiffened and tossed a peice of her hair over her shoulder. She'd gone into this not expecting one, but in her silence she demanded an elaboration, apollogy, something from Heero. But ultimately when she didn't get a responce it became clear that she would have to take other courses of action.

"What is wrong with you?" The demand was verbal now, but somehow even less effective."I thought you asked me to come out here, in the freezing cold I might add, because you wanted to see me!" After a teary sniffle planned or inflicted by the cold weather it was difficult to tell. Her lips parted as if to attack him with something else, but closed again. she heaved a heavy sigh and piveted on her heel, twisting around to face the opposite direction. With a second sigh, and a dramatic heave of her shoulder she began a set of determined paces. It was an effort to keep the smile from her lips. 'Even my oun acting skills shock me from time to time. Now if Heero is any sort of strategist, he knows he'll have to take action soon, lest i get away.' Her pace quickened to reach the streetlight that she'd been aiming for.

When she reached it she felt a little disgruntled that Heero hadn't made himself known to her yet. She worried her lip between her teeth resisting the urge to look back. But the Peacecraft was not left hanging for long. Just as curiosity began to twist her neck in the direction of the bench they had preciously been positioned at, Heero's voice called to her from the oposite street corner. "Relena" Blonde strands of hair floated gracefully to the other side of her neck with her abrupt pivet of the heel. "Heero! I knew you'd follow me Heero, kitto-" Her vocals spilled into a stream of self satisfaction and confidence. Untill of course, she noticed the gun in his hand pointed at her. Shock and a noticable hurt stung in her eyes and it sickened Heero. 'kuso' I've seen that look in Duo's eyes before. It's not yours Relena, it's his.' A snarl contorted his lips. "Omaeo korusu." The trigger was pulled with an audible empty click as no bullets were firied.

She watched as Heero's hand retuned to his side, the gun replaced in his pocket as he walked away uttering no further words to her. She might have allowed herself to have felt hurt buy the coarse words he had said to her. Might have if she hadn't know it was merely a display of affection he had developed for her. It wasn't of course very evident to anyone else. But she knew it to be true, and thats all that would matter in the end. After all that had been one of the first things he'd ever said to her, so she cherrished it. Still, a soft wimper of a 'Heero...' escaped her lips as she watched his fingure dissapear into a thickening crowd of people.

Onto Chapter 2...


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

The november rain was cold as it lightly misted the world. Small light snowflakes fluttered sparsingly through the raindrops. Neither of which were of consideration to Duo on this chilled afternoon. The braided youth sat on the safe house roof, his thoughts wandered forcing his body to endure the elements clad in only a simple pair or ligh blue jeans and a wine colored T-shirt. Though not a single chill inflicted by the weather ran down his pale flesh.

:"Hey, Remember me? I was once in you. I was kind of like the blood inside your veins":

Duo's arm rested casualy on his right knee, hand and wrist hanging limp off the edge. His fingers twitched with the painful memories of people once known, places once visited, all flashed dimly across his dream like state.

Solo.

Duo's heart lurched. All of his senses and memories seemed to explode at once. Temperatures, textures, tears. And blood.

:"Violet, like my love like my blood. Violet, still racing through my veins":

Solo and I crouched behind an abandoned market stand that sat quietly in an alleyway that lead into the market place. We could see the vendors shouffling storrage boxes and the colony town's people fluttering throughout the stands. Whlie we lie hidden in the shadows, with barely enough room to move I could almost feel Solo's heart beating inside mine. It wasn't that we hadn't lifted food before. There was just a certain life that solo and I created together when we embarked on our embezzlement missions. it wasn't that we were theves, but that we were hungry. at least, that's what I always thought.

Today, Solo and I had only one target.

Fruit.

But I was also a little bit nervous. Not because what we were about to do was difficult, or because I was worried about getting caught, but because I could hear Solo's breathing. I nearly leaped out of my skin when his hand brushed over mine. He must have noticed the hitch in my breath because he looked at me and smiled. My eyes were wide and my heart fluttered. He laughed quietly.

I'd never felt so embarrassed and ashamed of myself. I think he knew that too. Maybe even used it against me.

I was glad when he whispered the next phase of the plan bringing my attention back to our mission. Heaven knows he could probably read me like a book.

"He hasn't unpacked the melons yet. I'll need you to distract him while I get behind the counter."

As Solo spoke I watched the man. he seemed to be taking a break to suck on his pipe.

"Get him to help you pick out something ripe," He smiled and his eyes sparkled in a curious way. "Use your eyes."

My eyes had always been an easy tool for me to exploit due their abnormal color. The town's priest always told me he thought they were the color of God. I'd be a fool to

believe him.

I nodded in acknowledgement, and began to crawl out of the termite plagued wood. Solo's hand stopped me by grabbing my ankle. My heart stopped. "Good luck."

"Yeah." I didn't need it. This was just another necissary part of life. luck wasn't involved.and besides, I could see a ripe mango with my name all over it. At least it would if I had a name.

Standing up I brushed as much dirt off of my clothes as I could. upon approaching the grizzly man I ran my fringers through my hair that reached my hips. making sure to stay in the sunlight, I used it blinking until my eyes started to water, giving them a glistening effect. This man didn't look very bright, and I knew I was androgenous enough to fool him. And even if I wasn't, the people around here didn't exactly

"Sir?" No one can resist the charm fained politeness contains.

He looked up from his pipe, and ran his eyes up and down my figure. probably trying to decide what gender I was.

"Aah?" his voice was rough. It matched his bear-like build. shaking the hair from my face I revealed my eyes, catching them in the sunlight and began a string on nonsense and bullshit, somehow pertaining to his stand and that i wanted his help. His gaze handn't left my eyes and i knew he wasn't listening. hook, line, and sinker.

"Becuase you see, I don't really know how to check if it's okay to eat yet or not.."

He stood up from his chair and I realized he must be a good two or three feet taller than I was. Not that that was hard to accomplish. I was only a few inches above three feet.

He placed his hand around my shoulder and guided me to the display of oranges and bananas explaining in detail how and where each was grown and that it was crucial to pick them and just the right moment. He of course was a master at this. through the noise of the streets I could hear Solo's steps aproaching from the hidden alleyway. When a forien elderly woman presented herself and took the man away from me, trying desperately to comminicate with him,

I siezed the oppertunity to stash my mango, an apple, and a few other fruits down my undershirt. Poor bastard. He'll never know they're gone.

I was just about to take my leave when three loud thuds errupted from behind the stand. The vendor whisked around from his attempted conversation with the woman. I had to take action now, lest Solo be next week's special on the butcher's block. I swiped at a few apples

jutting out from the rest causing them to fall to the ground, bouncing as they hit the dust.

I gasped and held my face in my hands. "Gomen nasai! I was pushed from behind and knocked them to the ground!" I bowed deeply and descretly slipped one into my sleeve. "please forgive me!" From the corner of my eye I could see Solo running down the alley behind the fruit stand. "My apologies!" that was my que to join him.

I pivoted on my heel and dashed towards the next street exit on the left, hoping to meet up with him on the way to our hide out, but I tripped as one of the apples fell from my shirt, and I landed with my face in the dirt. 'shit.'

When I tried to pull my self up and run again i already knew it was too late. But my doom was confirmed when I felt his grasp on the back of my shirt. I cried out and struggled to get free but i was healplessly weaker than he was. I felt a sharp pain in the back of my head just before I blacked out.

When I opened my eyes again I was lying on the ground in an unfamilier alley with the vendor was standing above me with a dagger. It hurt to focus, and I tried to roll out of the way as he brought down the knife, but not with enough time to save my stash. or my shirt. The produce spilled forward and tumbled away. I wasn't sure if it angered him more, or excited him to witness the rest of the hidden fruit roll away.

"filthy theif," He ground out. But there was a grin spread over his lips. Before i could get up again he had me pinned with the full of his wheight tossing the dagger a short

distance to the side. "I'm going to show you what happens to little boys who pretend to be little girls."

Lying beneath his monsterous wheight it was becomming more and more difficult to breathe. My eyes burned and threatened to spill over with tears. My belt was ripped from my waist, and my pants torn from me and tossed aside. I was naked and welling up with fear and hatred.

"Lie still and take it boy, you won't live long enough afterwards to make it worth it."

I cried when he penetrated me. Searing pain shot through all of my nerves. I cried seven shamefull tears for every one of his disgusting violations of my body. Eventulaly I did stop struggling, and I began to understand what Hell was like. Hell is when you can't see the otrocities being preformed on your body. Only a blinding nothing. Hell is When you begin to feel your chest caving in, when can't get the smell of your asailant out of your nose, and when you can taste the metalic flavor of your oun blood.

Just when I was beginning to belive I would be trapped like this forever, I heard him screaming, and the sound of Solo crying for me to run. For a moment I couldn't understand what was happening. The world was spinning. I could see the man was reaching for his back as blood ran down his body and pooled in the dirt. That spurred me to notice the dagger was missing from where it had been lying just feet away from me.

Before I could give Solo a quizzical glance he was pulling me off the ground and shouving my pants into my hands, forcing me to run with him. We ran like Hell which must have been miles. My limbs felt like they could barely move. The simple act of moving my legs made me gasp and wail in pain. But solo wouldn't let me stop. In retrospect I probably owed my miserable life to him. Funny how things work out that way.

When we finally made it back to our hide out-which was really a run-down storrage shed, I felt like I could pass out and sleep for years. But of course, that'd be too easy. God has a way of making sure life stays difficult. The moment I stumbled through our back entrance I promised myself I wouldn't alow anymore tears roll down my face. It wasn't long before that promise was broken.

Solo lead me to the thread-bare blankets on the floor where we slept, and tried to comfort me. He stroaked my back and pulled me close to him. I hated him then too, becuase I was embarrassed that I had allowed myself to fall into such a situation. I had too much pride to be comforted this way. It seemed that with every gesture of kindness from him, more tears fell and I became weaker. For a moment I wished that I had that dagger, so I could spear Him the same way he stabbed the vendor from the market. But that only resulted in more tears, and more shaking convulsions, and sobs.

I can honestly say that when Solo's lips touched my cheeks I was shocked. He kissed the tears rolling down my face as his hands glided down my arms and around my lower back. It was so unexpected that my body and my heart became paralized. I didn't dare breathe. He lifted his hands to my neck and gently wove his fingers in the hair at my nape below the braid.

"I'm sorry I didn't notice your absence earlier. I should have been there to help you sooner."

More tears.

"I can never undo what that man forced upon you, but I don't whant you to keep living witha fear or hatred of the act." His hands were in my hair again and his voice was low and velvety. I could feel him gently lowering me to the floor but i lacked the strength to protest. I'm not sure if I quite understood where that had been leading at the time.

"That's why I'm going to show you that it's a statement of love. Not of violence and pain."

My breath hitched when he pressed his lips to mine, and my cheeks flushed with embarrassment. i could feel my trousers being gently pulled down and exposing my flesh to the cool air. I shivered and Solo wrapped his arms around my shoulders and kissed my neck.

My whole body quivered and abandoned it's resolve to struggle. Until I could feel warmth between my legs. I jumped and probably shrieked. "Solo! Iyada!"

He raised his face to look at me with clear cobalt eyes and replied with a simple "why?"Just then my brain froze and I couldn't for the life of me come up with a reason why I thought he should stop. All I could think about was the intense heat of his mouth wrapped around my- I flushed and fell back on an entirely b.s.-ed answer.

"Because it's disgusting! you'r a guy!" When he answered with a nonchelant "So?" I felt baffled and cornered. I couldn't formulate a comeback on that one. He grinned and my heart burst.

"Now stop finding embarrassing excusses. I know your gay." I blinked and felt dumbfounded. He said it so bluntly. And after I tried so hard to run away from that fact and deny it when aparantly Solo had known it all along.

I could feel his mouth around me again and I groaned. I briefly thought about relaliating, but what was the use? Besides I'd always sort of thought Solo was cute anyway.

I clutched at the bedding and wrythed. I'd never felt anything quite like this before. I'd never even touched myself before this. I cried out his name as I felt myself come into the hot cavern of his mouth. He swallowed and chuckled. I tried to pout defyantly. But he only laughed at me. I couldn't help but find this whole situation extreamly embarrassing. Especially because Solo seemed to be enjoying it so much. And at my expense. I hated the way he could kindly mock me.

I forgot about all of that when he kissed my neck again though. My whole body melted into the floor as his lips fluttered down my neck. My stomache butterflies soared to my throat. I sighed heavily and he smiled warmly at me. I couldn't help but smile back. We kissed and the world around us melded together.

:When I held you in my arms, I thought this feeling was just ours...:

Suddenly reality flooded into Duo's body, his heart felt squeazed with rage and betrayal.

"Damnit!"

Taking his cigarette, Duo shouved the lit end into the tender innerflesh of his forearm, allowing his flesh to burn. He hissed in pain and squeazed his eyes shut, as hot tears rolled down his cheeks. Cold raind drops falling heavily around him, one extinguishing the cinders reavealing singed flesh.


End file.
